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1Heart
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Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 1128
 
   Posted Yesterday 10:02 PM (GMT -6)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
Hi,

Does anyone want to share their thoughts on what a community of believers can or should be like? I love Larry Crabb's thoughts on community. I'm an idealist, and definitely a dreamer when it comes to thoughts of community. In the past couple of years though, I've had those dreams "dashed" against the rocks, and have experienced a more painful reality - of what it is, and what it's not. I don't harbour any unforgiveness toward any individual, but just realized that I was expecting what is not humanly possible.

So, what is humanly possible? Is your experience of community like mine? What do you long for?

Paint me a picture of what you would love to see in a community of believers...

God Bless,
Jo-Anne


"Sometimes all we can do is go back to the character of God, and drop anchor there."

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might-be-don
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Date Joined Jun 2001
Total Posts : 830
 
   Posted Today 2:28 AM (GMT -6)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
This is an interesting question...

Normally we reach into the past to find out what community meant to our ancestors. We attempt to paint a picture based on notions of what we thought things might have been like. In the words of some modern day bards, "That was then, this is now" .

The world is different today than it ever has been in the past and we need to forge a new vision of community in the future. At no time in the past could I ask advice from such a wide range of folks in an instant or participate in moon_river_j's life.

Unfortunately, we don't have many models for our community of today. But I think we touched on the foundation in another thread, we must be transparent before each other. We/I guard places in our lives that we have judged to be too ugly to show one another. The oneness that Jesus prayed for among believers cuts to the very core of who we are inside and will sooner or later lead to every tear being wiped away. Community will first and foremost require tears. Not of shame, but of relief from our burdens had have grown too heavy to bear alone.

The words of Jesus concerning whatever you do to the least of these you do unto me levels the playing field. We cannot treat each other any different than we would treat Jesus. That we might be one...

peace, don


"Life is a gift from God, but the years have weight in them."
Terry Scott Taylor

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1Heart
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Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 1128
 
   Posted Today 8:27 AM (GMT -6)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
quote:
Originally posted by might-be-don

This is an interesting question...

Normally we reach into the past to find out what community meant to our ancestors. We attempt to paint a picture based on notions of what we thought things might have been like. In the words of some modern day bards, "That was then, this is now" .

The world is different today than it ever has been in the past and we need to forge a new vision of community in the future. At no time in the past could I ask advice from such a wide range of folks in an instant or participate in moon_river_j's life.

Unfortunately, we don't have many models for our community of today. But I think we touched on the foundation in another thread, we must be transparent before each other. We/I guard places in our lives that we have judged to be too ugly to show one another. The oneness that Jesus prayed for among believers cuts to the very core of who we are inside and will sooner or later lead to every tear being wiped away. Community will first and foremost require tears. Not of shame, but of relief from our burdens had have grown too heavy to bear alone.

The words of Jesus concerning whatever you do to the least of these you do unto me levels the playing field. We cannot treat each other any different than we would treat Jesus. That we might be one...

peace, don



Don,
I love your answer about community. You're right. This is a kind of community as well. Here I can rub shoulders with people from all over the world, and from all walks of life, adults of all ages. I can read the thoughts of theologians, ask questions, study theology and philosophy, talk about all aspects of life as a believer, and come to a greater understanding of the Father. Not to mention the inspiration and transformation that takes place in my life as a result. This is a unique opportunity, one that I treasure in my walk with the Father. I don't know how long I will have this opportunity, but I am grateful for the time I have here. I don't consider it a waste of time, as some might, but I must use my time here judiciously. My life is honestly packed full of activity, which may be the greatest blessing, and at the same time the greatest downfall of my life. (ask my husband). I wish that he would participate here as well, but at this point in time he has absolutely no interest. To him, community is service, it is active ministry. "Talk is cheap" in his estimation (no offense to you, or to anyone here. He sees this as "vain jangling." I see it as broadening my horizons. I am actually free to pursue my relationship with the Father, and am passionate about that. I minister as well...but He thrives on it. I thrive on my relationship with the Father, then add other things to my life.

We all bring something different to community. Transparency is one aspect, but I have come to realize that it depends on the relationship that others have with the Father. I will not be transparent to an entire community - at least not completely. It is not safe. It should be, and as Larry Crabb describes - could be. But it's not. I am transparent with one or two in this walk. I will be AS transparent as I can be - safely - within my community. Some might say that I have a trust problem (I don't), but perhaps they've never tried baring their soul (I have) and watching what happens next.

Community is most often hurting, wounded believers (going out on a limb here), and often people who do not have a relationship with Jesus Christ, at least not a living, breathing, vital relationship.

Community should be a place where no one is left undiscovered. Each person should be loved and accepted, and discipled. I believe it's possible to have holiness without legalism.

Some thoughts for now...more later...gotta run (my life!)

What do you think?

God Bless!
Jo-Anne Big Smile


"Sometimes all we can do is go back to the character of God, and drop anchor there."

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Tigress
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Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 1252
 
   Posted Today 9:29 AM (GMT -6)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
Community is sooooooo haaaaaarrrddddd! I'm not very good at the social aspect of being human so it's especially difficult for me to not be a fair-weather friend. But, one thing I've noticed about the many, many different small groups I've been in over the years.....often there's one person that is in some way socially inept and extremely emotionally needy and he or she is exceedingly difficult to deal with and most people don't even really want to be around them. I can think of three examples. First, one guy was obviously very needy and tended to vie for attention by interrupting people, being long-winded and making snide comments disguised as prayer during group prayer time. He even used to try to greet the women with a kiss using the Biblical passage in which Paul admonished the believers of his day to greet one another with a holy kiss. And when the women didn't want to, he'd get very upset and try to preach that verse to everyone.

In the second group another guy was also very emotionally needy. There were about seven guys and eight gals in that group and he almost obsessively pursued all of us women in the group without any sense of boundaries. He'd give us unwanted gifts, call us up with unwanted phonecalls, and corner us at get-togethers in unwanted conversation.

The third guy in the last group is the same way. He's long-winded, constantly brings up every last little emotional issue he has and his problems with his family and job during what little group discussion time we have, and he repeats the same old stuff over and over again at each meeting. He's deeply depressed and talks of suicide and has even attempted it, I think, but his personality is such that no guys really want to get close to him. The men in all three of these groups didn't want to get close to any of these guys.

In a way, I sort of blame the men in these groups for not befriending and mentoring these guys. I mean they kept trying to get all sorts of love and attention from the women, when what they really needed was male friendship so that they'd learn acceptance and self-esteem so they wouldn't think they needed a woman to solve all their problems.

One thing about being a Christian is that we're the ones who have to take in the unwanted ones - the ones that the world doesn't want to have to deal with. Because we're Christians we have to accept everyone with open arms. I've found this to be extremely frustrating because we're often forced to deal with people who should really be seeing professional therapists or ministers trained in dealing with emotionally unhealthy people. How as a Christian and as a leader of a Christian small group can you deal with a person like this sensitively? Personally I don't even want them around and I know others feel the same way, even though they won't admit it. What would Jesus tell us to do with these people who we would never, on our own, choose to hang out with? Because if they join our groups and keep coming back we're essentially stuck with them.


Tigress Tigress

"Name a shrub after me. Preferably one that's prickly and difficult to eradicate."

-Captain Jack Aubrey
"Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World"

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might-be-don
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Date Joined Jun 2001
Total Posts : 830
 
   Posted Today 10:06 AM (GMT -6)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
I tend to paint with rose-colored glasses.

Your questions, "So, what is humanly possible? Is your experience of community like mine? What do you long for?" , ask about both what is possible and what is desireable. If I have to choose, I choose what is the longing of my heart.

peace, don


"Life is a gift from God, but the years have weight in them."
Terry Scott Taylor

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trosie
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Date Joined Jul 2001
Total Posts : 550
 
   Posted Today 6:49 PM (GMT -6)    Quote This PostAlert An Admin About This Post.
quote:
My life is honestly packed full of activity, which may be the greatest blessing, and at the same time the greatest downfall of my life. (ask my husband).

I can sure relate to that! Sometimes I ask God why there couldn't be more hours in a day and why I couldn't have just a bit more energy so I could pursue all the areas I want to without taking away from my family. By the time I am finished giving to my family and my work I find that the time I have left is VERY limited in giving to the community and the body.


quote:
Paint me a picture of what you would love to see in a community of believers...

Often my favorite pictures of community are found on television sitcoms. Cheers, for example, was a place "Where everybody knows your name and they're always glad you came...." These folks "did life" together albeit in a bar. Sometimes it appears that the "world" does community better than the church.

I also get a picture of community when I watch a movie about the underdog team pulling together and winning it all against the unbeatable, all-star team!

The song I hear in my head is an old one we used to sing in the Catholic church post-Vatican:
"We are ONE in the Spirit, we are ONE in the Lord ... and I pray that all unity may one day be restored. And they'll know we are Christians by our love, by our love. Yes, they'll know we are Christians by our love."


Love,
trosie
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